This is very much a first draft, and subject potentially to drastic changes as I just wrote it today after a humorous encounter that took place while I was walking my dog. Dogs are funny. I hope this poem captures some of that humour. Pointers on length, format, language, etc, appreciated.
With half-foot leaps and ears a-flapping
the threestrong tribe of sausage dogs approached rapidly,
barking across the autumn field.
Their owner’s cries of “heel!” followed the dogs in vain
as they neared the solitary Labrador dog
who waited with ears pricked up in trepidation.
At length the first salami-shaped warrior arrived
to within three feet, from where he barked his battle-cry,
at which the black lab stared mute, without reply.
With his challenge unanswered and his companions in support
The lead tribesman hopped closer on his five inch-high legs
Until he stood right under the his foe’s wet black nose.
He shouted again: “Greetings fellow canine, I am Lord Dashington the despoiler,
(although some call me Timmy,) a proud member
of the great dachshund tribe of fearless warrior hunting dogs.
Famed throughout the world; our name comes from our quarry:
the terrible badger, or ‘dachs’, auf Deutsch,
in the pursuit of whom we are renowned beyond compare.
No dark badger lair is too fearful for I,
or for brethren you see standing not far off,
and as such I challenge you, should you accept
To do battle upon the open field, right here and now.
But before battle commences, I must know your pedigree;
what is your fame and from whence do you come?”
The Labrador had been staring blankly ahead throughout the monologue,
but at this he lowered his head a little, grinned sloppily,
and announced: “My name is Finn, and I like chewsticks,”
Then stepped nimbly around the dachshund,
sniffed its behind quickly, and then turned and lolloped away
across the grass, leaving the outraged sausage dogs in his wake.